(CNN) -- An 84-year-old Florida woman claimed the second-biggest U.S. lottery jackpot Wednesday and will pocket a $370 million lump sum before taxes, state lottery officials announced.
How pissed is Gloria Mackenzie right now? You finally catch your huge break in life, become an overnight millionaire and you're 84 fucking years old when it happens. Brutal. I guess she can go on an absolute tear for the next 18 months or however long she has left. Buy everything, do a bunch of blow and die in a fiery wreck during a police chase in her new Ferrari Testarossa. That's what I'd do. Go out like a boss. But if I'm being honest, I wouldn't even be buying lottery tickets at her age because of the off chance I might actually win. It's like the weirdest form of self torture: "Oh great, I have all of this money and no time to spend it. Fuck".
The funniest part of the article:
Mackenzie turned down the 30-year payout and took the smaller one-time amount, O'Connell said.
Oh, no shit?
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